Wave 4 – Procrastination: The Fear Beneath the Surface

Procrastination is a very strong word. It implies that you decide to postpone starting or completing your tasks. Some people think this is just laziness or disorganization, because sometimes you don’t even know where or how to start.

But for me, procrastination is more than that.

I believe our internal system is pre-wired with old beliefs and past experiences, even the ones we don’t remember. Things we learned as children, things we heard growing up, things we saw our parents worry about. All of that, consciously or unconsciously, forms who we become and how we make decisions.

For example, when I was a child I loved painting. Art was definitely my thing. But materials were expensive, and taking classes would have been a luxury we couldn’t afford. Slowly, that love for art became, in my subconscious, something unaffordable, something beautiful, but not for me and I never pursued it.

So it wasn’t procrastination — it was scarcity.

I learned from a young age: I can’t, I don’t have, I can’t afford. Those thoughts created a false illusion that I was not able to do it. Even when my heart and mind wanted it

Fear stopped me. so I didnt procrastinate art. I buried it.

I think we do that with many things in life.

Why don’t you travel if you think you might love it? Why don’t you change your wardrobe for something you really like? Why never try new foods, new ideas? a different hair style?

Why are you stuck in a place you don’t want to be, in a relationship that is hurting you, or in jobs that make you unhappy?

Many times it’s not because you are lazy or irresponsible, but because your subconscious is telling you: No. Stop. You can’t do that.

It’s interesting how sometimes things align. Last night I was walking and thinking about today’s Wave, and procrastination was the word in my mind. This morning I realized how many things I have neglected for months. Not because I don’t want to do them, but because I’m afraid to ask for help, afraid to do it wrong, afraid to find out that maybe I can’t.

I’m also reading a book, and today’s chapter was about procrastination. There was a sentence I highlighted, and I closed my eyes for a moment to really process it:

“The Single Most Destructive Thing You Can Do Is Nothing.”

That sentence stayed with me.

Because what happens if you try and fail? You learn another way. What happens if you try and succeed? Then you try again and improve. But if you don’t try, then nothing happens, and nothing changes.

I’ve been thinking about TodayWaves for a long time, writing ideas on pieces of paper, thinking about it while driving, while working, while walking. Always thinking it has to be perfect, that I’m not ready, that it’s not good enough, that maybe it’s a bad idea, and that “what if” was slowly killing the idea before it even started.

This is a work in progress. I learn something new every day. This is my project, its my baby, and it needs to crawl before it walks, and walk before it runs. No rush, just progress, enjoying the process.

Apple was born in a garage. TodayWaves was born in the middle of a storm in my life.

So maybe it’s not procrastination. Maybe it’s fear.

And maybe the wave you fear is the one that can change your life.

– TodayWaves

Leave a comment

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑